Dear Employer,

Due to the heat, the humidity, the horrible people I encounter on my commute, my hatred for summer, other people's sweat (OPS) and the fact that the yogurt i brought from home for breakfast was warm by the time i reached the office, I'm requesting permission to work from home until approximately September 15th, or until the temperature drops below 75 degrees.

Please let me know if this will work for you.

Best,
me.