a letter

Dear niecephew, this is your auntie d here. i want you to know that even though you're just an itty bitty tomato, i love you already. no matter how big you get, or what fruit or vegtable you resemble and even when you stop being compared to produce, i will still love you because you'll be my niecephew and i'll be your crazy auntie. A lot of people already love you and are gonna keep lovin you a lot and i want you to know that starting right now.

We're gonna have some good times together. I'm gonna let you eat a lot of junk food and then when your parents wonder why you don't feel good, i'm going to deny it. I'm going to take you to terrible places like state fairs and amusement parks where you can run around like a wild child and i won't care because after a few hours, i'll get to return you to your parents. i'm gonna buy you lots of things you don't need and that my husband wishes i wouldn't spend money on but you'll love me more because of it so it will be worth it.

Your dad doesn't like when i ask too many questions, as i have a tendency to do, but i have a feeling he will want to answer all of yours. so when you get big enough, i'm gonna use you to ask all my questions. you won't mind, though. i'll bribe you with candy and other evils and we'll both be happy.

Baby, you're already smart and only getting smarter because you have some serious brains for parents. i'm gonna teach you some things they don't know like how to perform the entire score from dirty dancing and how to feed the dog under the table without them finding out.

now quit givin your momma heartburn.

love, auntie d