an email to the family.

If you're spending thanksgiving with me, you were lucky enough to receive the following email:

Dear people whose share of stuffing i will be stealing,

I present to you, your assignment for Thanksgivingpalooza 2008:

ABC poems.

Listen, times are hard, maybe next year there will be more poems to choose from but right now, it's slim pickins - we're in a poetic depression and we have to work with what we got. Even if you hate this type of poem and you're bored with it and it make you feel unappreciated, be thankful that we have any poem at all because right now, lots of people don't have a poem to piss in. But I digress...

The ABC poem has a series of lines that create a mood, picture, or feeling. Lines are made up of words and phrases. The first word of line 1 begins with an A, the first word of line 2 begins with a B etc.

For example:

Are you ready for the
Best thanksgiving ever?
Could it be that a
Delicious dinner will be served and
Each of us will have to read our poems
From start to finish? Yes, we will bring culture to
Greenville and
Have the most wonderful thanksgiving
In history

You do not have to write all the way to "Z" but of course, that's encouraged.

Some tips:
Dad, you need only write one poem as there is only one english alphabet and i will not accept poems in other languages.
Mom, while i'd like you to take this seriously, please don't worry or agonize over it.
M., remember, [redacted's] don't like to be outsmarted.
Seester, remember, [redacted's] don't like to be outsmarted.
Brudder, have you actually read this far into the email?

Good luck and godspeed-