korean beef

Whenever I get a manicure like I just did, as in about an hour ago (uh huh. during the "work day"), the manicurist always looks at my hands and asks, with such disappointment in her voice, "why you bite???"

What is she expecting me to say? I bite my nails and cuticles because I think my fingers look good all chewed up. I like having stubby, little, red fingers, makes me feel well-groomed and pretty. No, this is not the truth. That's why I'm here, lady, so that you can clean these puppies up and make me appear like i don't spend half the day gnawing on them.

Maybe she wants a real answer. Next time she's say: "why you bite??" I'm gonna say: I'm not entirely sure. Maybe if I knew why I did it, I could stop myself from doing it but as of right now, it's just something I do, subconsciously or even consciously, because I feel the need to. I think they call that addiction. whoops. I chew out of boredom or when I'm entertained. I bite my nails when I'm frustrated and sometimes because I'm just feeling happy. There's really no distinct pattern. Either way, my therapist is aware of "the situation" and we're looking into it, so don't you worry. Also, all of my loved ones literally smack my hand out of my mouth when they see me going for a prime cuticle or they just nag me to the point that i'd be happy to take my hands out of my mouth just so that I can bite on their hands or strangle them . So you see, I'm trying to get to the bottom of it and when I do, you'll be the first to know "why i bite" except then I won't need a manicure because my nails will be looking good all year round. So maybe it's best for you and your business that I keep biting. This way we're all happy, k?