i feel better

i just had to get that all out. i felt a tribute was necessary and yeah, i cried a little but once the tears were out, i was done and ready to move on. yesterday, my mom was trying to make me feel better (before i even got upset), saying things like: "it's a good thing!" and "you're getting married and making your own home now." But the thing is, i know all of those things and i am genuinely happy for this transition and life moving forward but that doesn't mean a big change isn't happening and that a fixture from my childhood is being shaken up. i just needed to acknowledge that and mourn that and now, i'll start again. I wouldn't change any of it but it's still hard. I had to break a little bit in order to readjust and fit back together again. now i'm there.